Dependent Personality Test

The test below is not designed to diagnose dependent personality disorder; it can only help you identify some of the traits that are characteristic of dependent people. If you score high on dependency, you may want to talk about your results with a mental health professional.

I struggle with everyday decisions and need to consult someone about every little thing.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

Typically, I avoid responsibility.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

Being rejected is one of my greatest fears.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

I get attached to people very quickly.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

I feel more confident when someone tells me what to do.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

Generally, I feel powerless.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

Almost everyone I know is more competent and confident than I am.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

I see myself as an extension of my protector and caregiver, usually a parent or partner.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

The idea of being autonomous scares me.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

My parents, my partner, or somebody else have to decide what happens next.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

I am told I am passive.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

The idea of being alone and having to do everything by myself terrifies me.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

Overall, I am quite pessimistic.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

I am extremely anxious about being separated from my parents, partner, or another person who makes many of my decisions.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

Being alone feels extremely uncomfortable.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

I need other people’s approval.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

If I lose my current caregiver’s or protector’s support, I will probably be unable to care for myself.
Agree
Agree slightly
Disagree

GET RESULTS

How to Interpret Your Results

Agreeing with some of the statements above suggests that you have some dependent personality traits. This does not necessarily mean that you have dependent personality disorder.

Consider talking to a mental health professional if

• you agreed with more than a few of the statements above or slightly agreed with many of them,
• you often feel powerless or incompetent,
• you are strongly affected by the fear of rejection or abandonment,
• a person you depend on for support is abusive,
• you live in a state of constant anxiety,
• you don’t trust yourself,
• you generally feel vulnerable.

Even if the person you depend on isn’t abusive and your relationship works well, it can still be useful to develop greater self-reliance.

Here are some ideas:

1. Practice coping with difficult feelings on your own.

2. Learn to be there for yourself more often.

3. Attend to your own needs instead of waiting for someone else to do it or ignoring them altogether.

4. Gradually increase your time alone and learn to enjoy it.

5. Widen your social circle.

6. Seek support when you need it while also learning to support yourself.

7. Practice making decisions, no matter how small.

8. Practice expressing your own preferences instead of automatically going along with other people.

9. Notice when you seek reassurance and try making some decisions without it.

10. Remember that other people cannot be responsible for all of your emotional needs.

11. When you have a problem, practice looking for possible solutions before asking someone else to solve it for you.

12. Realize that dependence and love aren’t the same thing.

13. Work to overcome your fear of rejection.

14. Notice repeated reassurance-seeking questions such as “Do you love me?”, “Are you going to leave me?”, “How do I look?”, or “Are you interested in someone else?”

15. Work toward greater financial independence where possible.

16. Diversify your sources of happiness instead of relying solely on one person.