Enneagram Type 3: The Go-Getter

Core motivation: the need to feel valuable, the need to succeed, the need to feel productive, the fear of being average, the fear of failure, the fear of rejection

Coping strategies: hiding their true self, constantly adapting to circumstances, trying to come across as likable, constantly chasing goals

Fundamental needs: other people’s attention and admiration, acceptance, respect

Other names: The Achiever, The Winner, The Opportunist, The Status-Seeker, The Motivator, The Performer, The Champion, The Chameleon, The Careerist, The Doer, The Human Doing, The Producer, The Go-Getter

If you are not sure about your Enneagram type, try this test.

The Need to Win

Threes do not give up easily. Once they set a goal, they will do whatever it takes to achieve it.

Type Three is a complex personality type that often does things for reasons that are not immediately obvious. Much of what Threes do is not only about reaching specific goals. It is also about earning other people’s admiration.

If Threes could, they would erase failure from their vocabulary. Failure is something they feel they cannot live with. Threes are usually risk-averse and tend to compete only when they believe they can win.

Whether they have to work all night or simply look the part, Threes will do what needs to be done to achieve their objectives and make sure they cross the finish line first. That said, Threes are not necessarily perfectionists like Ones. They do not waste time trying to fix what is not broken.

Threes focus on two things:

• the job has to be done,
• and they have to be credited for it.

Once these two conditions are met, they are ready to move on to the next project.

Threes are generally status-driven. They pick their goals according to what society considers worthy. Whether it is becoming a doctor or a celebrity, Threes can do it.

The Three’s personal values can be hard to pin down because Threes often bury their true selves and follow cultural trends instead.

Hiding Their True Self

Because feelings like anger, sadness, guilt, or even love can disrupt their goals, Threes usually choose to ignore them. As a result, Threes are often out of touch with themselves. Instead, they identify with their image — an image that can change depending on the values of the people around them.

Threes try to figure out what qualities others want to see in them, then become someone with those qualities.

Because they adjust to other people’s tastes and expectations, Threes may display different characteristics depending on who they are with. As a result, different people can have very different experiences of the same Three.

Threes can also detach from their real emotions and display whatever emotion they believe is appropriate in a given situation. In the Three’s mind, it is never a good time to deal with their own issues. Goals come first; emotions come second.

But there is always something else to do. Years pass, and Threes become more and more disconnected from their authentic selves.

Threes often do not know who they are. All they have left is their carefully crafted image.

Image Consciousness

To Threes, image is as important as reality. They are the most image-conscious Enneagram type.

The way Threes look and behave depends on who they are trying to impress. It can be anything from dressing like a rock star to wearing formal business attire — whatever their audience admires.

Threes are often subtle showoffs, but they can fake modesty if that is what other people like. In other words, Threes embody the values of the society they live in, even when those values do not reflect who they really are.

The Three often wonders:

• Am I attractive enough?
• Am I competent enough?
• Am I successful enough?
• How do I come across?
• Did I say something stupid?
• Did I fail to impress them?

Threes are easy to spot. They are often the good-looking, well-groomed ones who seem comfortable chatting with different kinds of people.

Threes often display status symbols, such as designer bags, expensive clothing, flashy cars, fancy houses, diplomas, award certificates, and so on. But it can also be something less obvious, such as being well-versed in a subject, being cultured, or projecting class.

They may also brag about their accomplishments, their children, or their spouses.

Because of the Three’s tendency to chase other people’s values, it can be difficult to know the real Three. Threes themselves often have difficulty understanding their own feelings and needs. Even they may not know who they are.

The Fear of Rejection

Healthy Threes believe in themselves and believe that whatever they tackle will be successful.

Unhealthy Threes, however, become preoccupied with the fear of losing other people’s respect and admiration. An unhealthy Three’s self-esteem is based on professional success. Threes may feel inadequate if they do not have a prestigious career or if they are unemployed.

As they become less healthy, they may begin to abandon themselves in order to make a good impression. It becomes all style and very little substance.

The irony is that to gain other people’s acceptance, some Threes reject themselves.

Threes are not interested in pleasing everyone. They are interested in earning the trust and admiration of specific people — those they consider valuable, smart, successful, or important.

What’s Great About Threes

• self-motivated
• energetic
• positive
• hardworking
• great decision-makers
• action-oriented
• good providers
• make promises and keep them
• natural leaders
• socially skilled
• good at putting their best foot forward
• committed to improving themselves
• diplomatic
• charismatic

What’s Not So Great About Threes

• being out of touch with themselves
• getting carried away with professional pursuits and ignoring other people’s emotional needs
• stepping on others for the sake of success
• being too competitive
• rejecting friends and partners who do not help them move toward their goals
• marrying for money and prestige
• ignoring some ethical concerns
• being too materialistic
• scoring high on narcissism
• becoming workaholics

Jobs for Threes

• fashion designer
• entertainer
• marketing manager
• entrepreneur
• medical doctor
• salesperson
• investment banker

Enneagram Type Three Subtypes

Self-Preservation Threes focus on their work and on doing things in the best way possible. Self-Preservation Threes are more low-key than the other two subtypes and may resemble Ones or Sixes.

Social Threes often engage in attention-seeking behavior. They want recognition and admiration more than Self-Preservation and One-to-One Threes. Social Threes are the most competitive Threes.

One-to-One Threes want to have friends, partners, and children they can be proud of. They do not focus on their own achievements as much as they want to be associated with someone successful and influential. One-to-One Threes spend a lot of energy supporting and pleasing others.

Because love and admiration come from supporting others, One-to-One Threes put a lot of effort into projecting a physically attractive image, which they use to attract promising partners. Because of their relationship orientation, they may sometimes look like Twos. Because of their positivity, they can also be mistaken for Sevens.

Wings

People with a Type Three personality can have either a Two-Wing or a Four-Wing:

• The Three with a Two-Wing (3w2)
• The Three with a Four-Wing (3w4)

Enneagram Type Three and MBTI

Threes often test as ENTJs or ESTJs.

Famous Threes

• Sylvester Stallone
• Arnold Schwarzenegger
• Tony Robbins
• Tom Cruise
• Richard Gere

Enneagram personality test here.
In-depth test for Type Three (100 Questions)