Phlegmatic-Choleric couples prove that you don’t have to be similar to be happy together.
Personality compatibility is not about being similar but co-existing in harmony. You don’t need to avoid certain personality types because they seem very different.
Instead, you have to learn about both sides’ strong and weak points and turn your weaknesses into advantages. Fortunately, it is possible with any temperament. Now let’s analyze Phlegmatic and Choleric compatibility!
Although these two temperaments are very different, they are often drawn to each other from the first time they meet. It is thought to be because their opposite qualities complement each other.
Their problem-solving skills are an excellent example — thanks to their web thinking, Phlegmatic people tend to ruminate about the issue at hand but never solve it. They see it from so many different angles and can think of many facets of the problem that they never get to resolve. On the other hand, Choleric people are fast at making decisions but are likely to do that, skipping over the secondary data altogether. However, the Choleric and the Phlegmatic make a very effective team because they have these complementary qualities.
The same applies to their social skills. Of all personality types, Choleric people are the least compassionate. They are emotionally contained and may come across as blunt.
Phlegmatic people, on the other hand, are very empathetic and emotionally expressive. They want to please others and make them comfortable.
Both admire each other for these differences and will likely have interesting conversations. The Choleric will impress the Phlegmatic with the depth of their knowledge of a particular subject. At the same time, the Phlegmatic will awe the Choleric with their ability to see “the bigger picture”.
Phlegmatic people enjoy deciphering their Choleric partners because it is so easy! Choleric people love Phlegmatic partners’ warmth, acceptance, and compassion.
The Phlegmatic admires the Choleric’s ability to act freely and independently. On the other hand, the Choleric appreciates the Phlegmatic’s warmth and friendliness.
If these two see something worth pursuing in their relationship, they will be together. They are capable of reaching an extreme connection and intimacy with each other, but the only difference is that the Choleric partner will be less verbal about it.
There is some potential for problems too. Choleric people are emotionally contained – their ideal is to be logical and efficient. They don’t confess love very often, which could disappoint sentimental Phlegmatic partners who will try to interpret the Choleric’s behavior and may misinterpret it. They may decide that the connection is lost and may begin to feel unloved. Unsurprisingly, Choleric partners may feel misunderstood.
Choleric people admire self-control. If the Phlegmatic partner starts to overreact, the Choleric partner will get seriously annoyed and become even more unavailable.
Nevertheless, the personality compatibility is excellent here, and these two could make an exciting match if they manage to overcome their difficulties.
You can find more information on the four personality types and all related links on the main personality page.
Online CBT Platform to Help Deal with Relationship Problems, Anxiety, Depression, Addiction, and More. Includes professional follow-up by a CBT therapist. Click here to get started.