Personality compatibility is how two different, or the same, temperaments and personalities will get along together within a loving relationship.
Being in a relationship, regardless of whether you are the same personality type or not, doesn’t mean you have to think, feel, and act the same way as your partner.
Phlegmatic and Melancholic people have many differences in how they feel and how they view the world, but these differences could become their biggest advantages.
Although there is no natural attraction between these two personality types, they often fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after!
Phlegmatic people often get lost in the big picture, because they see the issue from so many different angles.
This quality results in a procrastinating habit when they keep ruminating about the problem at hand and never get around to trying to resolve it.
However, concrete-thinking Melancholics evaluate any problems carefully and set a deadline for getting things done.
In the Phlegmatic-Melancholic pair, this Melancholic trait provides a sense of security for the Phlegmatic partner, resulting in a partnership that works very well together.
On the other hand, the enthusiastic and optimistic Phlegmatic will be like a breath of fresh air to the Melancholic.
The Phlegmatic partner will energize his or her calm partner, and bring new ideas for their partnership.
Both personalities are striving to build a strong and stable relationship.
Despite the fact that the Melancholic is less emotionally expressive and won’t appreciate the depth of connection that the Phlegmatic is trying to make, they will admire the Phlegmatic partner’s emotional depth and loyalty.
Both types are caring and nurturing by nature, although the Phlegmatic will often be more sensitive to their mate’s needs.
Both are organized and orderly, and they will enjoy planning for their future together.
Both are likely to be attentive to their children. Although the Melancholic will tend to be stricter when trying to implement rules and schedules, the Phlegmatic will show a more loving and sensitive side, bringing about a “Good Cop, Bad Cop” routine that works in harmony.
These two types have similar feelings about belonging to society.
Both are eager to help others. Their only difference is that the Phlegmatic tends to be more compassionate to the individuals, while the Melancholic concentrates on the idea of supporting the community as a whole.
On the negative side, the emotionally contained Melancholic may feel uneasy about the intense passion of the emotional Phlegmatic.
On top of this, the Melancholic will not understand the Phlegmatic’s need to explore his or her own identity and become critical.
Once the Phlegmatic realizes that the Melancholic is not as romantic as they first may have hoped, they might get disappointed.
They are then likely to start to feel that the Melancholic is superficial, and at the same time, the Melancholic will feel unappreciated and irritated by the Phlegmatic’s self-absorption, and habit of analyzing the psychological aspects of the relationship.
Another potential source of conflict is that Phlegmatic people, in general, do not respect the authority without questioning it first.
In contrast, Melancholic people believe that they and others should always behave according to the proper conduct, preserving the customs and traditions of family and society.
Another thing that could cause them problems is that they could drive each other crazy with the way they reason.
While the Melancholic partner has a “facts and only facts” approach, the Phlegmatic partner loves to speculate, using their intuition.
Because of this difference, they may get on each other’s nerves, and in the end, the Melancholic may decide that the Phlegmatic is silly and impractical while the Phlegmatic may feel that the Melancholic is boring and unsophisticated.
Despite these differences, these two personality types are compatible with each other because both of them are nest makers.
If they commit to using their differences to their advantage, they can make a loving and effective couple that can last the distance.
Online CBT Platform to Help Deal with Relationship Problems, Anxiety, Depression, Addiction, and More. Includes professional follow-up by a CBT therapist. Click here to get started.