Having high self-esteem or self-confidence doesn’t mean to love yourself no matter what you do — guilt, regret, and self-reproach do have their place when appropriate.
It’s possible to be too confident, and that’s not necessarily a good thing.
Having low self-esteem, however, means treating yourself harshly even when you did nothing wrong.
Similarly, being inferior and feeling inferior are two different things.
Tiger Woods may be superior to you in golf, but the idea of his superiority in this area shouldn’t bother you at all.
Realistically acknowledging someone’s superiority without being bothered by it is healthy and natural. Feeling inferior, or having an inferiority complex, is a whole other story.
The test below is designed to evaluate your current level of self-confidence. If you score too low, don’t despair: Being aware of the problem is the first step to a solution. Self-esteem is something you can cultivate.
I am afraid to express myself.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I need to feel that my friends and family approve of what I do.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I try to live up to other people’s expectations.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
Many people dislike me.
absolutely true
true
mostly true
partially true
false
I am not an ambitious person.
absolutely true
true
mostly true
somewhat true
false
I am scared of looking dumb.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I lack communication skills.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I work hard out of a sense of responsibility in front of my family.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
Other people I know are much more attractive than me.
absolutely true
true
mostly true
partially true
false
I have a fear of public speaking.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I am concerned with other people’s opinions about me.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I tend to make mistakes.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I lack confidence.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I worry about my future.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I wish people appreciated me more.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I am indecisive.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I get embarrassed easily.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I don’t contribute much to this world.
absolutely true
true
mostly true
partially true
false
I have no one to talk to.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I am very timid.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
People expect too much of me.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
Nobody cares about my achievements.
absolutely true
true
mostly true
partially true
false
I feel misunderstood.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
Many people got the wrong idea about me.
absolutely true
true
mostly true
partially true
false
I don’t feel safe.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I worry for no good reason.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I am always worried.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I feel awkward when walking into a room full of people.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I don’t feel free.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I expect something bad to happen.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I suspect that people gossip about me behind my back.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
I wish I could be more social.
very often
often
sometimes
rarely
never
Your result will appear here.
HIGH SELF-ESTEEM: You are very self-confident and know how to accept criticism with grace and appreciation. Moreover, you are able to defend your point of view and rarely second-guess yourself.
AVERAGE SELF-ESTEEM: You are reasonably confident and rarely feel inferior to others. From time to time, however, you may feel the urge to conform to others’ expectations.
LOW SELF-ESTEEM: You are timid and hesitant. Any type of criticism causes you a great deal of pain. You tend to avoid confrontations and conform to what others expect from you instead of what you want to do with your life.